My Crabgrass Is Better Than Your Crabgrass


I went out to take my daily walk and cringed as I looked at out lawn. We have a lot of crabgrass this year. After two sessions of spreading crabgrass killer on the lawn, I raised the white flag and gave up.  The only thing left is a novena and a prayer that an Act of God will get rid of the crabgrass, at least for this year.

My father, if he were living would probably call out the National Guard and go out and nuke it with whatever strong stuff that he could find. I’m less noble. I’ll just walk away and shrug my shoulders. I don’t have the killer instinct in me. I’ll wait for the winter to kill it all off and then next year put down some new grass and plant it thick, thereby killing off the opportunity for it to take root. That’s my half- baked plan, anyway.

Actually, in my daily walk through the neighborhood, I see a lot of lawns with crabgrass all over the place. Some yards are even worse than ours. It doesn’t take away my guilt, but it relieves me of some of my pain. I also wonder why this is happening.

I have come to the conclusion that part of the reason is the economy.  People are working so hard, maybe with two jobs, that they have no time or energy to take the time with their lawns. They don’t have the money to spend on Tru-Green or Chemlawn to come out and spray their lawns, either. Any money they make is being used for essentials, like food, mortgages, gas for the car and so forth.

Bad lawn: Another by product of our poor economy. Maybe we should send a patch of our crabgrass to our lawmakers and president as a reminder for them to fix the bad economy and our lawns. Maybe we should send some to the CEO’s of the oil companies as a reminder for them to use some of the profits to help us fix our lawns, if we can still afford the homes that sit nest to the crabgrass.

Better yet, forget the whole thing and be thankful. The crabgrass is always greener on the other side.

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